“Letting go doesn’t always equate to what you are losing or missing out. You’re growing, you’re shedding, you’re becoming”-Alex Elle
Walking away is a powerful tool. It puts us in control of our emotions and responses. It shows great maturity and wisdom. It reveals an individual’s strength and the amount of love they hold for themselves.
But what does it truly accomplish?
Each morning, I awaken with consistency. We all do. For me, in the hour before dawn, I pick myself up, shuffle down the stairs, pour myself my single serving of cold-brew coffee and make my way to my favorite spot. It is here every day where I choose to walk away. From what? Only clarity will reveal.
I sit in silence anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour, depending on my needs. During this time, I reflect. I meditate, clearing my mind of yesterday’s chatter and tomorrow’s worries. I let go of the residual conflicts and stresses over what might be or what might have been because neither can be controlled, changed or managed. They no longer exist.
It may be an encounter with an individual who treated me with disrespect.
It may be thoughts of ‘what if’ regarding a situation in my life.
It could be me mulling over a stand I took for my own well-being.
No matter, if it has plagued my mind and is not of this moment, I let it all go.
I visualize each fruitless situation sinking into a beautifully calm river, each one as they arise in my mind. Sinking deeply and forever gone. I let the flowing water rush over these thoughts as they disappear from my calm space, making room for the beauty of the present moment.
This is release. This is walking away.
You see, life is full of yesterday’s events and interactions. Why breathe life into them through our own energy when they are dead? You cannot change the outcome, as it has already occurred. You cannot undo or make happen what is done. You can only find peace and growth by walking away.
Tomorrow hasn’t yet happened. Why breathe life into one negative and worrisome possibility by giving it energy when thousands of other possibilities exist, ready to be one exactly what you want? The future, tomorrow, is unpredictable and no matter how much planning you put into controlling it, it will do what it wants to do. Everything is temporary. Our relationships. Our jobs. Our children. Our friendships. Our homes and material possessions. Even our own health. Worry, planning and control does not change their future.
Spending time controlling or trying to create an outcome is akin to wasting precious resources by throwing them in the fire. We continue to live in the past and attempt to predict the future, all the while missing out in the life we have in front of.
We wouldn’t hesitate to tell our dearest friend just how toxic her abusive partner is to her soul and how she needs to walk away. Why then do we hold onto the toxic energy of yesterday’s trauma, reliving it over and over and over even though it’s no longer real, except in our mind? Why do we hold onto the expectation of tomorrow, planning for a single outcome and worrying about a single possibility, creating an ignorance of reality and possibility?
Walking away from yesterday’s experience helps us open the door to the possibilities of tomorrow’s bounty. Walking away from the expectation of people, places and things helps us live fully in the moment with the things present here and now.
Walk away from the people who do not bring a full smile to your face. Walk away from the cities and places that leave you feeling drained and emotionally challenged. Walk away from the exes, the past, the abuse, the conflict and the chains dragging you into depression. Walk away from the things that do not serve your highest being.
This may be someone you love who is draining your vitality or it may be leaving a job where you feel exhausted and stressed as a norm. This might even be simply walking away in the moment from someone who is choosing to nag or yell at you in a fruitless expression of their own negative emotions.
Whatever happened or whatever could happen, walk away and make space for what is intended to be.
When you let go, you create room for growth. Our roots can go deep and our blooms can open fully.